All this palaver with my brother about being a stranger; how growing up in our house left us all with PTSD (I didn’t tell you about that) and trying to get him to talk about it left me open to karma coming ’round. Taking the beam from one’s own eye is a lot harder than you’d think – emotionally and psychologically. Fortunately, when you get to the place of wanting to remove that ego support, The Spirit is there to assist. Robin to my Batman? Nah. More like providing the guidance and energy to root into the ground of my stuff and bring up the truffles.
Over the years I have done a lot of work to deal with my own trauma and I did pretty well, I think. Oh, but thinking such things is really just cockiness, isn’t it? So I am reading David James Duncan’s Sun House which is quite an ambitious book that doesn’t quite flow the way one would hope. On the other hand when an author delves into mysticism (the real stuff not the watered down pablum that most people these days are into,) he or she sets a real high bar for themselves. The fact that Duncan almost carries it off is to his credit, I promise.
Half way through the book one of the characters is challenged by Jervis, the ragamuffin mystic, who walks the streets of Portland following the guidance of Ocean, to do his heart work. I felt very much like Karma knocking at my door, yelling IT’S TIME. Following the lead of the book’s character, Jaimey, I began to examine my own unresolved resentments and hidden away fears, angers and even love.
it didn’t take five seconds to realize that I had uncovered a trove of noxious suppressed ego defenses that needed to be managed and let go of in order for me to grow in my ability to love others and to become my “true self” as Thomas Merton would say. So Now I’m on a side trip that must be finished in order for me to get where I want to go. I have to say: I am grateful for the Karmic nudge.
PEACE and LOVEYA,
Ron
Camel Through the Eye 